The second night syndrome
THE SECOND NIGHT AFTER YOUR BABY'S BIRTH- what's happening to my calm baby and how do we deal? No family is immune from the second night struggle bus. Let's first dive into why it happens and next strategies to get through it.
Your baby was cozy as could be in your uterus until it was issued its notice to evacuate. Delivery was a huge shock to baby and because of that they're exhausted (and so are you!) The first 12-24 hours baby is likely super sleepy and calm, but the second night rolls around and your baby isn't acting like the night before. They aren't sleeping right after feedings, hard to comfort, won't sleep in their bassinet and seemingly starving. They're HOMESICK.
Your perfect uterus was their home for their whole lives and they miss the constant movement, warmth, your heartbeat and steady stream of food. Think of it like your first time away from home as a child. You were excited about the chance to get away but reality sets in, and you miss home like crazy.
Here are some strategies we tell our moms to get through it:
[1] recreate their home: swaddle, white noise, dim lights, as close to mamas heartbeat as possible.
[2] tag team with a partner/family member- when baby is in a deeper sleep, pass baby off to a loved one and catch a little sleep. Giving them a shirt you've recently worn to drape over their shoulder so they smell you works like magic!
[3] cuddle- skin-to-skin is the perfect reset for you and baby
[4] know you aren't starving them- if breastfeeding on demand or formula feeding, they will seem as though they want to constantly eat. You can feed often, but don't assume every cry is hunger, sometimes they're just saying "hold me".
[5] anticipate it and understand why- take at least one nap the day after delivery, so you don't go into the night more exhausted than you have to be. Knowing why the second night if often a rough one, can make it a little bit easier to tackle it when it's staring you down
Of course there are a handful of exceptions that time up with the second night that could be something else. Lean on your care team and speak up if your mom gut is telling you something is off.
Your postpartum nurses Meg and Carly here to prepare you for postpartum and beyond. We want to make sure you have the education you need to care for your own healing body after birth, not just your baby.
Postpartum prep courses occurring regularly intended to be taken during pregnancy are now open for registration. Then join us in our online community for the growth, support and empowerment to continue <3
